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An artist-filmmaker-psychoanalyst's quest to reconstruct her life after attempting to end it

Learning to Speak is a personal documentary that chronicles the filmmaker's journey through mental illness, treatment, and self-discovery. Following the death of her father, she revisits the open psychiatric hospital where she spent three and a half years after a suicide attempt in her early twenties, seeking to understand its impact on her life and make sense of the fragments of her past. As the filmmaker sorts through her late father's belongings, she reflects on her childhood, her struggles with isolation, and the complex dynamics within her family. Looking back, she contrasts her experience in a locked psychiatric ward with the open hospital, where interpersonal relationships, community, and creative expression were central to the healing process. Through candid interviews with former patients, many of whom are artists, she explores the power of these elements in navigating mental health challenges. Interwoven with her present-day journey, these reflections create a dialogue between her past and present selves. The film delves into the challenges she faced in finding her voice and expressing her inner world, revealing how art ultimately became a means of communication and self-discovery.



Run Time: 50 minutes

Sneak Preview Screening and discussion with Michele Beck and
Austen Riggs Center CEO/Medical Director Ed Shapiro, MD

June 12, 2025

Helen Mills Theater. 137-139 W 26th St,  New York, NY
DIRECTED, WRITTEN, PRODUCED, EDITED
Michele Beck

CAMERA
Sebastian Currier
Pawel Wojtasik
Donnie Rogers
Andrea Rogers

EDITOR
Adam Zucker

MUSIC
Sebastian Currier

SOUND DESIGN & MIX
Quentin Chiappetta

COLOR GRADING
Bjorn Bellenbaum

WITH THE PARTICIPATION OF
Mashuq Mushtaq Deen
Dot Rose
Carrie Rubinstein

THANK YOU
Edward Shapiro, MD
Eric Plakun, MD
Samar Habl, MD
Marilyn Charles, PhD
Jane Tillman, PhD
John Zollinger
Aaron Beatty
Lisa Lewis
Diane Heckman
Michael McCarthy
Jill Gibbons
Maggie Mailer
Ed Orbach
Claudia Jaul

SPECIAL THANKS
Jorge Calvo

VERY SPECIAL THANKS
The Austen Riggs Center

WITH DEEP GRATITUDE
Anton Hart, PhD

©2021 Michele Beck. All rights reserved

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